I remember that night as clear as a cold winter sky when the stars are shining bright against the dark canopy of the heavens. I was cleaning out an old file cabinet in the back of a storeroom when I came across a very official looking envelop. I debated at first about opening it since it had the look of something that should only be seen by someone much farther up the food chain than I would ever be. But then I thought, who would know, it had obviously been lost from the system for many years and somehow had landed in this old file cabinet, buried in the archives of bureaucracy forever, or at least until I found it that fateful night. I turned the faded brown envelop over in my hands many times and wondered what I would find if I opened it. The debate raged in my mind for a few more moments and I made the decision to break the rather official looking seal and read the contents sealed within. Little did I know how profoundly it would change my world and break my heart.

As I pulled the document from the envelop, I knew it was something very official. It has the look and feel of the official pronouncements made by those in authority and posted around the building for all to read and obey. And even at that moment I somehow knew deep within me that something was very wrong, a sense of fear and darkness covered my heart. It was then that I saw the words that would shatter my world and plunge me into a struggle for the people I loved.

Notice Concerning all Newborns and Infants

It has come to our attention that we do not have the financial or human resources to care for the needs of the newborns and infants that are seeking admittance to our institution. We are therefore restricting the admittance of these individuals into our organization until such time as they are capable of caring for their own needs and can offer assistance to the health and well-being of the organization.

It is apparent that these newborns and infants are not capable of feeding themselves and thus require that we provide special food resources and in addition people to do the feeding.

We have also noted that these newborns and infants are not capable of keeping themselves in clean and proper order and thus require that we provide significant human and financial resources to meet these needs as well.

It is obvious from our observation that these newborns and infants are not contributing to the financial and human resources of our organization. Therefore, they will only be admitted to our organization once they have matured to the point where they can care for themselves in a manner designated by the membership committee and are willing and able to meet the membership requirements concerning giving and serving.

We will allow infants to attend meetings and to contribute as they are able, but they will not be considered a member of the institution until such time as they meet the above stated requirements.

As I finished reading the notice I felt a wave of fear and sadness sweep over my soul. It was not an accident that the weak, the lonely, the lost were kept outside the boundaries of the group. I had seen so many struggling, desperately reaching out for a hand, a word, something to help them in this new life. I had sat with them as they struggled to leave the old behind and find their way in this new life. And at that moment I was suddenly overwhelmed with the realization, it was not an accident.